Tag: Funny

Austrian Police Okay Granny’s Weed Grow Over the Phone

Last week, in Austria, a 78-year-old woman came out to the world as a successful cannabis grower. The pensioner and medical cannabis gardener shared her run-in with the law on Austrian television’s Die Barbara Karlich Show to a receptive audience.

“Mara” from the state of Vorarlberg wanted to try cannabis in the form of tea and oil to treat her chronic pain. So she recently started to grow a few plants, using cuttings purchased legally.

Now, the cannabis granny has three flowering plants that are already over two meters high.

"Mara" showing off the size of her cannabis plants.

Mara (right) showing off the size of her cannabis plants to an entertained studio audience.

Not interested in hiding from authorities, Mara dutifully reported the plants and her plans to produce medicine to the police because she was unsure about the legality of her operation.

In Austria, cannabis seeds and even non-flowering plants are legal because they can not be used to make narcotic drugs. Hundreds of aromatherapy strains are sold in the country’s many clone shops.

However, once the plants develop buds, they become illegal and their cultivation becomes a criminal offense regardless of the intended use.

The officer on the phone when Mara called squeezed both eyes in what must have been pure bewilderment before informing the polite woman she could only own a maximum of two plants. Thereupon, the 78-year-old answered, “That’s all the same to me, one could pine away.”

Despite her very public outing and three flowering plants, the police have not visited the green-thumbed pensioner’s garden.

[embedded content]

Photo courtesy of Allie Beckett

 

Start a Marijuana Business Today: CertificationClinics.com™ offers a comprehensive business model for recommending Medical Marijuana Certifications and/or Dispensary Ownership in your area. The CertificationClinics.com™ Business Support staff will educate you in every of the growing medical marijuana industry, providing you a fully operational and profitable enterprise. Learn More »

California Smells Trouble, Bans Marijuana Drone Delivery

California lawmakers are working to beat a Jan. 1 deadline for the implementation of legal marijuana, and there are some very interesting inclusions in the Bureau of Cannabis Control’s newly-released licensing program regulations for businesses.

While the legal cannabis industry is poised to create a plethora of new jobs in California, one sector that apparently won’t see much growth is marijuana delivery drivers — unless they want to get their commercial driver’s license. The newly-unveiled guidelines mandate that “cannabis goods will be required to be transported inside commercial vehicles or trailers.” The regulatory guidelines go on to include bans on marijuana delivery or transportation via “aircraft, watercraft, rail, drones, human powered vehicles, or unmanned vehicles.”

Were drones actually delivering weed in California and I wasn’t taking full advantage of that spectacle?

Well, technically no, but there were already struggling companies such as Eaze teasing the service to cash in on some futuristic publicity. Here you go, I guess.

[embedded content]

In January, the Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) reported that over 670,000 drones had been registered with the government, which likely accounts for a fraction of the drones actually owned (or built from spare parts) and being flown everywhere. FAA Chief Administrator Michael Huerta estimates that by the year 2020, nearly seven million drones will be owned in the United States.

With the steep rise in drone availability (and affordability), businesses are chomping at the bit to start using the flying robots to their advantage. Amazon is already testing its upcoming Prime Air service that aims to deliver products purchased online to their not-so-patiently waiting customers in 30 minutes or less.

[embedded content]

You have an idea how popular this service would be if you’ve ever waited around on a Saturday in Orange County, California for a weed delivery. While half of Huntington Beach waits for Timmy in his Corolla to get done with his chicken nuggets and finish the rest of his route, a drone could be doing fly-by product flips around the clock.

While the ban on drone delivery for weed companies is somewhat puzzling, some of the other restrictions make total sense. Allowing cannabis to be delivered by “human-powered vehicle,” which is either a car from the “Flintstones” or a bicycle, seems dangerous for the operator, as any bike rider with a backpack may become the target of robbery attempts. California will require all marijuana deliveries to be conducted by licensed retailers, who must hand-deliver the product to the customer, so you can forget about self-driving delivery vehicles as well. Retailers will also be required by law to equip each delivery vehicle with GPS tracking capabilities.

The FAA has actually loosened the restrictions on drone flight in recent years to make it easier for businesses to incorporate the technology into their future plans, even providing exemptions to laws that require drones be flown within the line of sight of its operator — a severe hindrance to corporate adoption. The new business-friendly rules require operators to obtain a specific drone-flying certification and never fly their drone at speeds over 100 miles per hour or at elevations over 400 feet off the ground.

So, if other legal businesses can use drones to deliver their goods, why can’t the weed industry? Only reasonable explanation I can come up with is the Bubba Kush aroma may distract other pilots in the air.

superman-smell

 

Start a Marijuana Business Today: CertificationClinics.com™ offers a comprehensive business model for recommending Medical Marijuana Certifications and/or Dispensary Ownership in your area. The CertificationClinics.com™ Business Support staff will educate you in every of the growing medical marijuana industry, providing you a fully operational and profitable enterprise. Learn More »

Dutch Police Confiscated Cannabis, Left Fir Plants for Growers to Find

On Saturday, July 22, 2017, the Dutch Police were tipped by a hiker who found a makeshift plastic greenhouse containing five cannabis plants in the forest near the small town of Epe in the province of Gelderland.

greenhouse in the forest

According to the Epe Police Department, the concerned hiker initially paid little attention until noticing the tent was partially hidden by branches and leaves. When the curious hiker came closer, he saw five cannabis plants and called the police. On Facebook, the police published their ingenious tactics to eradicate the forbidden plants:

In the night of Saturday, July 22, 2017 on Sunday, July 23, 2017, we examined the situation and saw that five big cannabis plants in the tent. As there was no owner of the tent, we decided to destroy the plants on the spot, giving them back to nature. This prompted us to return something to the owner of the DIY-growing tent. In order not to completely disappoint the unknown cannabis grower, we have refilled the flower pots. The grower will not get rich, but a forest is a place for fir trees. With the five hemp plants in hand and a smile on our face we left the forest. Unfortunately, we will never know how this inventive hemp growers will respond when seeing their own grown fir-cannabis. The grow will be cleaned up by the municipality.”

cannabis plants forest

In the Netherlands, the cultivation of five plants is tolerated so long as the grow is not conducted under artificial light; the plants must be grown on private property but cannot be visible to the public. Cannabis cultivators must also ensure that neighbors do not feel disturbed by the smell or the sight of the plants. If the police receive a complaint about 1, 2, 3, 4, or 5 cannabis plants, the offending plants will likely be seized without criminal prosecution of the owner.

In this case, the humor of the police did not win many laughs on social media. Instead of laughing at bad jokes at the expense of self-suppliers (“Five plants won’t make you rich!”), many readers demanded the long overdue legalization of cannabis in the Netherlands.

Photos courtesy of Politie Epe

 

Start a Marijuana Business Today: CertificationClinics.com™ offers a comprehensive business model for recommending Medical Marijuana Certifications and/or Dispensary Ownership in your area. The CertificationClinics.com™ Business Support staff will educate you in every of the growing medical marijuana industry, providing you a fully operational and profitable enterprise. Learn More »